Archive for December, 2009

Dec
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Al Qaeda Crotch Bomber’s Underwear Revealed – Ouch!

In standard gay Taliban and Al Qaeda fashion, the failed underwear bomber used a small explosive device stuffed inside of his bikini bottoms.  Hard line Islamic extremist have always been known for their oddly feminine ways and we have yet another confirmation: Explosive bikini underwear crotch bombs. This has to be the most hilarious ‘terrorist fail’ yet.  The media seems to have snatched the term “Underwear Bomber” but I prefer “Crotch Bomber”. 

Here is the newly released picture of Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab’s soiled bikini.

Bikini Briefs? Seriously?

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See our previous article “Are Heterosexual Taliban a Dying Breed”.

Continue Reading…

Dec
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Symphony of Science & Carl Sagan Kickin It Autotune

Carl Sagan and Stephen Hawking Break it Down!

Symphony of Science did an amazing job remixing Carl Sagan’s “Cosmos” and various other science figureheads into three awesome tracks. You’ll see Stephen Hawking, Michio Kaku, Richard Dawkins, Michio Kaku, Robert Jastrow, and “Bill Nye the Science Guy”!   Also I’ve included links to download the mp3′s for each song.  Richard Dawkins continuously sounds like super wuss though.  Maybe he’s still sour over our last post about him.

See the entire Symphony of Science music video gallery after the jump……….

Continue Reading…

Dec
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Charlie Brown Jihad Christmas – Video

The “Charlie Brown Christmas” cartoon that we all know and love with has flipped over to a new tradition.  In a moment of questioning his Christian faith and with the help of towel headed prison convert Linus, Charlie Brown finds ‘the path’ via Islam.  Watch out for the explosive ending!

Continue Reading…

Dec
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MTV Pushes Youth to Use Sex to Rock the Health Care Vote

Thank you MTV ‘brainwashing committee’ and RockTheVote.com for promoting unethical and whorish behavior once again.  The video produced below tells the youth of today to use sexual favours to influence the health care vote.  I can’t believe we’ve stooped to a level where this type of marketing is acceptable in mainstream media.  This is a slap in the face to democracy and a thumbs up for bribery.

The final line says it all.  If you don’t vote for healthcare “we will never ever F**k you”.

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This is embarrassing to the current generation.  The vote should be based on what you believe according to the information you’ve collected; not on the influence of someone’s bribe. Continue Reading…

Dec
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Just give the Kid his Bacon back – Wife Swap

King Curtis, the the bacon lover from Wife Swap

He may be a spoiled little punk in need of a throat punch, but he is correct…..bacon is good for you.  Just ask your cardiologist, I’m sure he\she’ll agree.

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Watch the Full Wife Swap Episode S5 E18 after the jump: Continue Reading…

Dec
Dec
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The Legend of the Mall Ninja – Gecko45

First I want to thank LonelyMachines.com for the Original 2006 Mall Ninja post:

They kept the mall ninja legend alive and compiled the entire rantings of the legendary “GECKO45″ from various tactical forums.  For military and law enforcement members, this may be one of the funniest forum posts you’ll ever read.

 

 

 This is a collection of the wisdom posted on the internet by a guy calling himself Gecko45. It all started back at the end of the halcyon summer of 2001, and his posts have created a certain urban legend that many refer to as the Mall Ninja. Hang out at any gun shop, gun show or shooting match and you’ll see one of these guys; you might even see a group of them since they are known to associate in the wild.

The Mall Ninja is easily distinguished by an abundance of “tactical” gear, such as fatigues, a thigh holster (with, of course, a Glock), combat boots, bandolier and other accouterments that you’d usually only see on a SWAT operative. Median age is usually 19-25, and they tend to boast about their various exploits with certain Special Forces units, all of which they’re too young and idiotic to have joined (real Special Forces types don’t brag). They typically have opinions on everything, regardless of expertise, they are uniformly poor shots, and they tend to exhibit a frightening lack of safety training.

 

The shadowy and shrill figure known as Gecko45 is the holy Dalai Lama of these dolts, but trust me, there are more. Many, many more.

 

 

Anyhow, I went looking for the original GlockTalk thread, and I found that it’s no longer archived. For a time, it was mirrored at mallninja.com, but sadly, the site is now down. Luckily, I had a copy of the thread cached (as well as a great one from the HK91 forum), so I figured I’d post it here. I’ve only kept Gecko’s posts (with one hilarious exception), since I don’t have permission from the folks who responded to him, but needless to say, he got grilled. A few folks even played along to get a rise out of him.

 

All in all, good fun. I’ve added emphasis to the parts that deserve particular attention, and a bit of commentary in italics. I’ve left all spelling and grammatical errors intact, painful as they may be.

So, without further ado: Continue Reading…

Dec
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Beenie Man Kicks off Festive “Kill the Gays” Concert in Uganda – Pepsi Sponsored?

This past Saturday, 5 December 2009,  Pepsi sponsored a concert series in Uganda known as the Chamuka Keys Finale, where a Jamaican dancehall artist known as Beenie Man performed. At the concert, reports from the Ugandan news outlet, “The Monitor” document that Beenie Man performed a song where he called for gay men to have their throats slit.  Add this to songs previously released by Beenie Man where he calls for LGBT‘s (gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender) to be executed, and for lesbians to be hung to death.

Mind you that a bill is currently being debated that would institute the death penalty for some members of the Ugandan LGBT population. Those that aren’t sentenced to death would be subject to prison terms and severe fines, solely because of their sexual orientation.

How Ironic is this Commercial……..?

Time for a bit more due diligence in your affiliations  Pepsi.  It’s understood that you probably had no idea that this concert was even going on, but you gotta get a handle on this.

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Quote From “The Monitor”

“The King of Dancehall stuck a sword of words into gay people through singing and talking. Continue Reading…

Dec
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Tiger Woods Photo Emerges after Counseling Session with Wife

Just goes to show, no matter what you have in a marriage and in life, the grass is always greener on the other side.

This time the green grasses were a few club chics named Rachel Uchitel, Jaimie Grubbs, Jamie Jungers, Kamile Moquin, Cori Rist, and or Mindy Lawton.   Wow…..Tiger put that putter away!

tiger reconciliation

What no driver?

Tiger Woods has Doodiepants.

2 brown stars being a complete toolbag to you wife and kids.

2 brown stars for being a complete toolbag to your wife and kids.

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Dec
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Christian Side Hug – The Rap Video


The ‘Christian Side Hug’ is the perfect hug for insuring no lustful thoughts enter the minds of any unmarried huggers.   It also serves to avoid any accidental junk or boob rubbing.  Watch the video and be put in awe.  It’ll be stuck in your head all week.

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There needs to be some sort of Christian cheese-ball commission; something setup to stop things like this or anything like it from ever coming out.  I realize that this would mean that nearly all of the Christian rap and rock from the 1990′s and most Christian t-shirts from bookstores be banned…….but something must be done.

Ryan Pann, the main signer and song writer spoke with the Chicago Tribune and admitted that the performance was a spoof.  But……when you  watch the video, there’s no indication of this.  They all seem pretty serious and gangsta gangsta.   Why would you let this video go out with no disclaimer?   I have no idea.  Now this video’s release is likely the largest regret of the Christian church since the the Spanish Inquisition.

The ‘Christian Side Hug’ is a more specific version of the ‘Church Hug’ defined in Urban Dictionary as “A hug in which Continue Reading…