DoodiePants

Can only curl 35′s because 90% of his arms are oil. And he smells like french fries.

Here’s a quickie.   I’ve posted on these Synthol guys injecting oil into their muscles before, but here’s a new one.   The awesome thing about this guy is that with his monster synthol oil filled arms, I still curl more than him and only weigh 180lbs.  I wish I could just punch him in his arm and see if I could make it pop into a pink mist of synthol.   Judging by the size of his forearms, which are ridiculously out of proportion, he has some normal size punk arms under all of that injected oil.

Are those tumors on his shoulders?  WTF?    I foresee him requiring hospitalization in the next few year much like the other idiots that take this synthol injection craze too far.

Synthol is one of the best known and most used SEO’s. A Site Enhancement Oil (SEO) is a liquid substance, usually a mixture of oils, used by some bodybuilders to increase the apparent size of some muscles. Continue Reading…

I have no idea why I posted this.  I was sitting there drinking whiskey and watching The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross, then fell into a trance and started copying and pasting video embed codes.  Bob Ross is dead by the way……but 5 streaming full episodes are in this post.  If you fall asleep while watching these videos(which is quite likely) Bob Ross may will speak to you in your dreams and help you pick lotto numbers and/or foretell the apocalypse.

In painting, you have unlimited power. You have the ability to move mountains. You can bend rivers. But when I get home, the only thing I have power over, is the garbage.” -Bob Ross

Go ahead…..watch, you know you can’t resist the Rossage.

Bob Ross Majestic Pine – 100th Episode

More episodes below Continue Reading…

I don’t know what’s up with this next trend I spotted on GhettoMyspace, but I love it.   The “eating money” trend seems to have been around for 6 or more  years. These ridiculous folks are so obsessed with money they pose in douchbag pictures and pose preteding to eat it or cook with it.   Judging by the backgrounds in the pics, the people eating money may want to do a little more investing.   Then , if they’re patient, they can eat their dividends.  Unless of course they put it into a DRIP(dividend re-investment plan), then they’ll need to wait until they decide to cash out.   I would suggest placing some into an ROTH then you can eat you money with tax free growth when you retire.  You really don’t want to lose to ability to eat money as you age.  That would just be silly.  Stack or starve  dude……. Stack or starve.

Actual Caption: “So much paper, I gotta eat some dis S**t GWAP King”

The idea became widespread because of a famous blog post named “Black People Eating Money” in 2011. Then the pics weere kept alive on the trusty tracker of all that it thug life, GhettoMyspace.  The trend has since drawn participation from people of various ethnic backgrounds.  To see more people eating money, check out the gallery below Continue Reading…

Below are a couple intriguing videos of real exorcisms that involve the removal of “gay demons”.    It’s pretty trippy.

I think A real gay demon would never allow his victim to leave the house wearing this outfit. Continue Reading…

Lincoln Nebraska……where do you find them?  Cat lady wearing a hat, Jane Svoboda, has some of the most amazing jumps in logic I’ve ever heard by someone expected to be taken seriously.  But then again…..she’s schizophrenic according to sources and is under the protection of her brother. One has to wonder how someone who’s mentally ill, been declared incompetent, put under her brother’s guardianship, and lives in an assisted living facility, was able to get to a city council meeting in the first place; let alone be allowed to address it.  On the other hand, given the quality of what passes for political discourse these days, it does seem understandable that it would take people a while to catch on that she was not of sound mind.  That doesn’t mean we can’t laugh and be totally shocked though……I’m thinking she hangs out with the “Eat da Poo Poo Guy” from Uganda.  Those dirty dirty poo eaters.

A few Lincoln Nebraska Cat Lady Favorite Quotes

“Jesus was kissed by Judas, a homo, who tried to sabotage Jesus’ kind ideas. Do you choose Jesus, a celibate, or Judas, a homo? Continue Reading…

Forget “time out” and taking away video games for a week…..1/4 inch PVC is the best!

Hey we all need an ass whopping every now and then, but having it be the main form of punishment could get really old.  Not to mention, if you’re a little dude, I hear getting hit with objects by your parents too often can have some negative psychological effects. Spanking kids as a last resort is one thing, but Michael Pearl sets the main form of discipline being a whack with anything from a piece of wood to a 1/4 inch PVC pipe.  According to him if you want to know how to beat a child, a 1/4 inch PVC pipe is particularly good due to it’s high pain low injury ratio.

One of the most twisted instructions found in Michael Pearl’s book To Train Up A Child is where he suggests tempting a child with a bite of their favorite food ~ placing a piece within the child’s reach ~ and when said child instinctively reaches out for the food ~ Switch their hand once and simultaneously say, ‘No.’  Wow…….it’s like an instruction manual for building social retards.  Go Michael Pearl and your Epic Beard!  The ought to be called “How To Beat A Child”.

 No Greater Joy is the ministry of Michael & Debi Pearl under the auspices of No Greater Joy Ministries Inc. Michael has been a pastor, missionary, and evangelist for over 40 years. The Pearls’ five children were all homeschooled, and have grown up to become missionaries and church leaders. Though holding a degree from the Mid-South Bible College (now Victory University), when Michael is asked for his credentials on child training he points to his five children.  – NoGreaterJoy.com 

Here’s a quote from the maker of the video below:  Michael Pearl is a butthurt man. So in the long tradition of those who don’t like having their own words used against them, No Greater Joy Ministries has filed a false DMCA to try and silence those who speak out against him. I will not let this go unchallenged.   Watch him subjugate his wife and beat mock child below….oh what fun. Continue Reading…

Happy birthday Marilyn Monroe.  The silver screen super babe  was born on June 1, 1926 at the Los Angeles County Hospital.  Marilyn Monroe went on to become one of the most iconic figures in female media history.  Famous for wind blown skirts, seductive bikini poses and controversial sexual prowess, she may have been the Jenna Jameson of the era.  (though she definitely one upped Jenna by banging president Kennedy)  I think it funny how people idolize her and paint her as some sort of Hollywood sweetie.  The irony is staggering. She did a lot of drugs and had a lot of sex. Keith Richards and Axel Rose would have kept her wonderful company.  If Marilyn Monroe was a starlet born in 1985, we’d likely see her today on E! getting out of rehab, dating Charlie Sheen, and partying with Paris Hilton nipple slipping and crotch shotting like there’s no tomorrow.  And……she probably would have made a sex tape and fake accidentally released it to get publicity.

I’m Sexy and I know it

I don’t workout

Continue Reading…

What me? What’s the problem?

Ever since I can remember, I’ve always noticed something  weird about cat men.  Any guy over thirty that lives alone and loves cats……..is either really creepy or shockingly eccentric. I don’t know why so many cat men end up this way,  but I’ve compiled a small collection of pictures and video that I think illustrate my point perfectly.

Sometimes you CAN judge a book by it cover.  When it comes to cat men…….it’s a very odd book and probably a book you wouldn’t want to leave your children alone with or be stuck with in an elevator with no power.  You may think I’m being to harsh, but let’s think about it.  If your 5 year old needed a babysitter and the 35 year old single guy that lives down the street and owns 6 cats offered to babysit for a day, would you let him?  Nope……  Point proven.

In addition to the wonderful pictures above, I found a couple of websites  attempting to portray the ownership of cats as a masculine activity.  Haha cat men!     I also found the keyboard cat video….yay Continue Reading…

Don’t get me wrong, lots of dudes like a girl with full, pouty, sexy lips……but when they look like a buffalo carp that’s been punched in the the mouth repeatedly; not so much. The Botox and lip injection craze seems to have crossed paths with the “duck lips” phenomena and created an ugly monster.     Below are some of the worst collagen lip injections on the planet.

Trout Pout Duck Face

 When are these girls going to realize that they’re became the laughing stock of the internet with their plastic surgery trout pouts and not hot club chicks anymore?  Full Gallery Below…enjoy Continue Reading…

Not Appreciated

For those with a penchant for the disturbing…….there’s a cosmetics company by the name of “Neocutis” that is using pieces of human fetal tissue in their skin moisturizer products.  The company developed PSP for the treatment of skin ulcers, burns and scarring and soon recognized the ingredient’s value in restoring aging skin.  Neocutis cosmetic products using the cell line include Bio-Restorative Skin Cream, Bio-Gel Bio-Restorative Hydrogel, Lumiere Bio-Restorative Eye Cream and Bio-Restorative Serum with PSP Intensive Spot Treatment. In terms of price, they’re not exactly comparable to Maybelline: A 1-ounce bottle of Journee Bio-Restorative Day Cream costs $120.

Various pro-life groups have rallied against this company and shown their disgust for cosmetic use of flesh from something that had the potential to grow into a productive human being.  Fortunately Neocutis reassures the public that their use of “fetal protein” is along moral and ethical guidelines.  Thank goodness, I’m so glad that they’ve worked out an ethical way to use dead babies efficiently.  It really makes you feel all warm inside.

Meanwhile, no comment from PETA…….  It may have been a better PETA magnet if they were using dead baby horses to make shampoo, or mouse penises for lip injections.

Here’s a disclaimer on the Neocutis website regarding their use of aborted baby tissue. Continue Reading…