DoodiePants

We were so busy being hot, making gift baskets and planning conspiracies against the USA we totally forgot to call!

While living in an Islamic nation a couple years ago, I started a discussion with a local friend about 9/11 and advent of the recent conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan.  Often times these sort of discussions end up pretty interesting and I learn a good deal about international and religious perspectives. After the obligatory Bush bashing session was over, my Muslim friend informed me that the Israel had planned 9/11 and “everyone knows it”.   I was surprised by this claim. I had expected another “Loose Change”, ’9/11 inside job’ rant.  During my travels I’d heard Israel blamed for nearly everything wrong in the Islamic world.  Now, 9/11?  My well mannered Muslim friend then proceeded to tell me that it was a known fact that 4000 Jewish people had skipped work on 9/11/2001.  A Known fact?  According to who?

Do you realize the conspiracy that this would entail?  It would mean that a 4000 person secret Jewish network composed of regualr day jobbers, had to keep their lips completely sealed for the last 11 years.  This includes not telling their Jewish friends and family in other cities.    The belief also requires that the 4000 Jews that skipped work were all part of the plan in some way…..as none of them have come forward.  Imagine the number of people who may just have a problem with the the idea of covering up the death of 3000 non-Jewish American’s.  How is it possible that this many people had the ability to  keep a secret from the public that was this horrific? No way…..I had to investigate.

Trolling the internet I found the claim on many conspiracy websites and Islamic related sites and after reading a few, I realized that there was no actual evidence to substantiate the claim.  If there’s no evidence, why should we believe the less plausible argument?  It’s ridiculous.  The first known appearance of the “4,000 Jews” or “4,000 Israelis” claim was on Hezbollah’s al-Manar television on September 17, 2001.  

It claimed that 4,000 Israelis who worked at the World Trade Center “remarkably did not show up in their jobs” on September 11. The 4,000 figure apparently came from an article entitled “Hundreds of Israelis missing in WTC attack, Continue Reading…

God Hates Congress……and fags

I’ve been a fan of bashing Westboro Baptist church for the last couple years.  Now it seems that they may have finally been restricted from their bullshit veteran funeral protests.  Congress just passed the “Honoring America’s Veterans and Caring for Camp Lejeune Families Act of 2012″.     Below are some details on the effects of the legislation.

Westboro Baptist Church protesters will soon be severely limited in their ability to disrupt military funerals, after Congress passed a sweeping veterans bill this week that includes restrictions on such demonstrations.  According to “The Honoring America’s Veterans and Caring for Camp Lejeune Families Act of 2012,” which is now headed to President Barack Obama’s desk, demonstrators will no longer be allowed to picket military funerals two hours before or after a service. The bill also requires protestors to be at least 300 feet away from grieving family members. This aspect of the legislation was introduced by Sen. Olympia Snowe (R-Maine), who, at the urging of a teenage constituent, proposed new limitations on military funeral demonstrations as a response to a 2011 Supreme Court case that ruled such actions were protected under the First Amendment.  -Huffington Post

The “Honoring America’s Veterans and Caring for Camp Lejeune Families Act of 2012″ was signed in on August 6th  The law intends to curb protests at military funerals by increasing the buffer around the funerals from 300 feet to 500 feet, and increasing the buffer around access routes to a funeral service from 150 feet to 300 feet. The “quiet time” when no protests are permitted is increased to two hours before and after the service, up from one hour. The law also creates harsher penalties for violators, who will now face unspecified fines and up to two years in prison, instead of a maximum of one year.    Next I say they pull their 503c tax free status.  Hell, what’s it take to get one of those 503c’s statuses anyway?  Make a group and proclaim that you believe in a man in the sky?    Well, Westboro’s ‘man in the sky’ hates all of us Continue Reading…

So Mitt Romney wears special church authorized Mormon underwear…..we can make fun of him right?

Mitt’s Special Mormon Underwear….look closely

Mormon Underwear

Mormons complain a lot about being “ridiculed”, but they’re not the first.  Lot’s of people that believe ridiculous things without evidence get made fun of.  Heck…we posted earlier on a wingnut that believed that Fairies, Elves and Gnomes were real and all hung out in his back yard.   Doodiepants also mocked Sunni fundamentalist Islam for publicly stating that God doesn’t listen to farters, Demons cause respiratory issues, and sex with your slaves is totally acceptable.  Is it mean to expect otherwise intelligent people to let go of ignorance, bigotry, and superstition?  I think not…..  The same goes in the case for believing that an invisible universe creating super being is concerned with your underwear selections(Mitt Romney)——-Or that an angel revealed a message(Qu’ran) to an illiterate trader in a cave over a period of 20 years, or that people with black skin have been cursed by God, or that a loving and wise universe creator condoned slavery and ordered genocide a couple thousand years ago, or even that you get magical powers by believing spiritual propositions with out evidence.

Thomas Jefferson shared some words on that subject in relation to some seemingly unreasonable religious principles:  Ridicule is the only weapon which can be used against unintelligible propositions.  Ideas must be distinct before reason can act upon them; and no man ever had a distinct idea of the trinity. It is the mere Abracadabra of the mountebanks calling themselves the priests of Jesus.  — Thomas Jefferson, letter to Francis Adrian Van there Kemp July 30, 1816. So….I’m with Thomas Jefferson and Matt and Trey Parker, creators of “The Book Of Mormon” Broadway musical.  Let’s ridicule!

Video below….. Continue Reading…

Lincoln Nebraska……where do you find them?  Cat lady wearing a hat, Jane Svoboda, has some of the most amazing jumps in logic I’ve ever heard by someone expected to be taken seriously.  But then again…..she’s schizophrenic according to sources and is under the protection of her brother. One has to wonder how someone who’s mentally ill, been declared incompetent, put under her brother’s guardianship, and lives in an assisted living facility, was able to get to a city council meeting in the first place; let alone be allowed to address it.  On the other hand, given the quality of what passes for political discourse these days, it does seem understandable that it would take people a while to catch on that she was not of sound mind.  That doesn’t mean we can’t laugh and be totally shocked though……I’m thinking she hangs out with the “Eat da Poo Poo Guy” from Uganda.  Those dirty dirty poo eaters.

A few Lincoln Nebraska Cat Lady Favorite Quotes

“Jesus was kissed by Judas, a homo, who tried to sabotage Jesus’ kind ideas. Do you choose Jesus, a celibate, or Judas, a homo? Continue Reading…

What percentage of African decent blood gets you a “do not exterminate card”?

Kamau Kambon is probably most famous (or notorious) for a speech delivered October 14, 2005, at Howard University, urging genocide of whites, saying, “We have to exterminate white people off the face of the planet to solve this problem of racial injustice.” Footage of this speech is below and was aired on C-SPAN.  It’s surprising that anyone actually saw this since no one even watches Cspan…..but you can see it below

He supports his argument by calling the modern world an “international plantation,” with each white man a plantation owner. He claims that all whites want to rape and kill blacks.

Mr. Kambon has a website  at www.kamaukambon.org.  The website doesn’t seem to promote genocide, but it offers links and inspirational stuff about African-American culture, legacy, struggle and history.

Kamau Kambon  fits the card as a ridiculously racist dick.  I find it incredibly interesting that someone saying the  things he’s saying is given a stage.  It’s also quite interesting that he thinks there is a line of ‘white” and “black”. Continue Reading…

Economic arguments from generations ago play out before our eyes.  The original debate between Friedrich August von Hayek and John Maynard Keynes has shaped US economic policy for the last century.   Truly free markets…..or Government managed “Boom and Bust Cycles”.   The entire debate can be seen in this incredibly informative rap battle between Hayek and Keynes.  Get your smart on….

Politicians in Washington were quick to blame the free market that Hayek believed in for creating the boom and bust that has led to the recession that we are currently living in. Continue Reading…

“Most of the roughly 300 Occupy L.A. protesters were released from jail by Friday evening, with some immediately speaking out on the police raid that cleared their camp.  One speaker suggested that some of those arrested might need therapy. Several said they felt traumatized after witnessing police use nonlethal force and being forced to wait for hours in zip-tie handcuffs. Some displayed cuts on their wrists from the handcuffs. Others complained that they were forced to urinate in bags on the bus as they were transported to jails.

One speaker urged others to document any complaints. “Make note of every single violation of human rights,” she told those assembled.

- LA Times

“Now let’s get outta here and recharge with some wheat-grass shots at Jamba Juice.”  One occupy protestor echoed as he was leaving the police station.

Judging by the level of pussification and weakness displayed above, I think the solution for any future OWS protest will be a few gunshots in the air.  This will likely trigger extreme Continue Reading…

If only stereotypes didn’t correlate to reality so often.  “Hippies”——-who are generally known to be smelly, dirty and campish, have made their mark in the public arena once again.   These are NOT the granola eating breed of hippies that carry everything on their back or in their VW bus.  Nor are they the peaceful Eco-conscious stoners of yesteryear’s struggle. These are iPhone packing, Guy Fawkes mask wearing, anarchist, angry,  socialist mobs that only seem to respect free speech if you’re a fellow camper in their stank ridden tent city.    Their “mark” near the city Hall in Los Angeles, was a putrid 30 tons of trash. 

30 tons of dirty smelly hippie trash!

Where do they think the money comes from for cleaning up all their shite.

Continue Reading…

John Pike, famous U.C. Davis Pepper Spray Cop now famous and meme’d all over the internet.  Here are some  favorites for you viewing pleasure.  The original video is at the bottom of the post.   It’s pretty intense.  The pepper spray cop isn’t even phased.  It’s like he’s watering his garden or just Febreezin his furniture.

Thank you Officer Pike for your outstanding performance.  Without your quick trigger fingers or those sissy college student hippies we could have never had this much fun!  I’ve found that pepper spray is a perfect addition to salsas, ceviche and chili.  These protesters really didn’t take advantage of the free spice being dolloped on them.  Of course, when it’s directly applied to your mucus membranes, it’s difficult to prepare food……plus you’re covered in snot and tears for the next hour or so.

Continue Reading…

Bill Maher and Jane Lynch deliver a dramatic reading of Representative Anthony Weiner‘s sextings with that hot Blackjack dealer from Las Vegas – Lisa.  How could anyone in the public take him seriously after this?  It was some of the most ridiculous and creepy chat I’ve ever heard.  I’m sure the female Jewish population might also have an opinion.  I’m not quite clear on whether they were complemented or degraded for their……’abilities’.

"It won't go away and now I'm taking pics of it"

Be Aware, these sextings could not be published via major media outlets due to their vulgarity.  “Here at Real Time, we do take our responsibility very seriously as the one show, because we’re on pay cable, where we can say anything and quote anything,” Bill Maher said before introducing the actress Jane Lynch who will host upcoming Daytime Emmy Awards. ” The texts from Anthony Weiner were printed this week. Most people could not show them to you; we are going to read them verbatim.”

HBO, being the uncensored beast it is, offers us this totally disturbing video. Continue Reading…