Tactical Toolbags | DoodiePants

Mar

Mall Ninja Resurgence – Brother of Gecko45 Found?

Tactical Toolbags

I found another Mall Ninja on Pensacola Fishing Forum. Not sure—-but I’m wondering if could this be a reappearance of the legendary GECKO45—– maybe his brother?

This Capt. Ron guy is awesome! Between his blood loss, Epi pen shooting drills and his discounting of real world experience, this US Navy swimmer has mall ninja on lock down. I love his finishing line. “The fact still remains, I’m the only one that still hits his target at 50′, one handed, standing on one leg on an upside down Bosu ball. When any of you forum fighters think you can out-shoot me, come on down. I’ll give you a free lesson in bad-ass!”

Capt. Ron’s Forum Entry:

I have performed both adrenaline drills with a .3ml adult dose epi pen and the Dracula drill. Continue Reading…

Jan

Viper Academy – Mall Ninja School

Tactical Toolbags

We found more Mall Ninjas. In fact, we found a school dedicated to training them.

Fast Action Response Team (F.A.R.T.)

I can’t get enough of the Viper Academy. It’s like someone who grew up watching cheesy tactical shooter movies in a rough neighborhood then decided to confront violent crime by building a tactical training center with absolutely no military or police background. Enter the Threat Management Center of Detroit. Theses guys are walking on high beams with assault rifles, throwing knives, shooting airsoft rifles and brandishing ninja swords. From the videos below, it looks like they’re training for the Mall Ninja Olympics.

Mall Ninja Special Boat Division (S.B.D.)

I’d love to see them show up at Blackwater Training Center or try and pitch their training system to Triple Canopy or the like. They’d be laughed off the block. See the videos below for some super entertaining operator training. Continue Reading…

Dec

“Tier One” Operator Training Fail

Military Awesome,Tactical Toolbags

Dummy Guns? Who needs em!

I hope this training group has good liability insurance. It looks like another warrior ninja decided to make a tactical fighting course. You have a bunch of “experts” coming up with untested theories and Hollywood moves then peddling them as combat ready techniques. In reality, they’re performance art and should only be taught in Stuntman 101. It’s movie choreography, not war-zone ready tactics. Unfortunately for this instructor, life is not a John Woo movie. In real world situations, when you are in a life or death fight with your enemy, they not stop resisting and wait for you to finish firing.

The founder, Chris Collins, is apparently a US Marine Force Recon vet. Judging by his ridiculous ‘look cool’ fighting concepts,I’m guessing he’s a pre-9/11, peacetime deployment Marine. Could be wrong though.

I thought the point of training how to fight with firearms Continue Reading…

Dec

Ya’ll Need Need Some Bodyguardin?

Tactical Toolbags,Tshirts and Stuff

A bullet load of tactical forums have been posting on this bodyguard service from Montgomery, Alabama. I still have a hard time believing they real. It appears that a group of meth-heads who played too much Call of Duty decided to make a bodyguard company.

: Internet memes unite!
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

: He didn't take the blue pill or the red pill.....just the meth pill
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

: Why put the fat one up front?

: Not allowed to breed.....
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

: Sheeeeeeat, Thems my abs.
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

: When methheads buy weapons, gay carbines like this usually result.
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

: Rape......It's what I do.
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

: Arms stuck all retardish $200 Pistol Photo
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

: Caution, Ninjas are Everywhere!
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

: Keep her off the catering gigs
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

: Meal Team Six
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

: Light sabers even make these guys cool
For all your security needs, do not hesitate to contact Tactical Bodyguard & Security SVC of Montgomery, AL. We are a locally owned and operated company offering professional security and bodyguard service. We are focused and dedicated to providing high quality service and achieving 100% customer satisfaction. We believe that your needs are of the utmost importance and our entire team is committed to meeting those needs. In other words, we will do everything we can to meet your expectations. We specialize in security for clubs, bars, convenient stores, and private parties. We are also available if you need extra protection for shows, trips, dinners, or transportation. No job is too big or too small for us to handle. We are NOT a law enforcement. We are an independent company that offers protection for our clients and their goods. Whatever the situation, we are there to help. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry. Call us today!

If you have any doubts on the authenticity of the pics Continue Reading…

Dec

When Call of Duty Isn’t Enough – Airsoft Heroes

Military Awesome,Tactical Toolbags

Welcome to the world of airsoft. Please keep in mind that these pictures are not of active duty units, real world security contractors, or government personnel. These are folks that spend more money on gear than the actual BTDT’s (Been There Done That) they’re mimicking. You can tell by their hard looks and ‘rough and ready’ candor, some of these plastic BB shooting Special Forces posers think they’re certifiable badasses. Check out the amazing collection of Airsoft team shots I found on various team sites. They’re kind of like Mall Ninjas,(see the infamous internet gun forum legend Gecko45) except Mall Ninjas are way more respectable. At least they carry an actual weapons and are proud of their work. Also, below the gallery, you’ll find a funny list of “You know you’re addicted to airsoft when”. Check it for a laugh. Airsoft Toolsheds unite……

When being a tactical airsoft douchebag isn't enough, Photoshop yourself in war-zone backdrops with a trident in the corner.

TO see the entire gallery of Airsoft tactical posers, see below Continue Reading…

Jan

Military Sniper Ends Skinny Redneck’s Pity Party

Tactical Toolbags

Don’t let anyone tell you things like this only happen in the movies. Here’s proof that you really can shoot the guns out of people’s hand. Catching bullets in your mouth and some of the Remo Williams tricks are still up for debate.

A military sniper team aiding local law enforcement shot the pistol out of this suidical man’s hands. The man was likely distraught due to recent news related to something fitting his stereotype. Continue Reading…

Jun

Body Armor Two For One

Tactical Toolbags

One guy is a doodie pants for letting someone shoot them at that distance, even with body armor. One guy is a stud for taking one to the head and laughing about it (and fighting in a war of course). Language NSFW in the first one.

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DoodiePants

Mall Ninja Resurgence – Brother of Gecko45 Found?

Viper Academy – Mall Ninja School

“Tier One” Operator Training Fail

Ya’ll Need Need Some Bodyguardin?

When Call of Duty Isn’t Enough – Airsoft Heroes

Military Sniper Ends Skinny Redneck’s Pity Party

Body Armor Two For One

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